Missed Opportunities?

While on vacation in Newfoundland recently, I stumbled upon two sailing opportunities. One was aboard the Tall Ship Caledonia as a crew member. A security guard informed me they were looking for experienced sailing crew while I was longingly gazing at the docked ship. Having sailed as a working crew on the Tall Ship Alvei for 2.5 months and add to that a lifelong love for sailing vessels and the sea, I thought I might fit the bill. A few days later, an ad appeared in the local paper for crew on a sailing yacht headed for the tropics. The necessary qualifications topped out at the ability to distinguish a halyard from a sheet. I could do that!

So why am I not giddy from standing on the bowsprit as the bow breaks through the waves with the wind blowing my hair and the salt spray and sunshine stinging my eyes? Two reasons that go hand in hand: family and love. My dear toddler son and my best friend, my husband. Leaving them for weeks at a time would be unbearable. As a teenager I dreamed of living aboard my own sailboat with no ties to land to hold me back. Now I realize how much I would have missed in life had this became my calling. The giggle of my munchkin, a hug from my husband atop a mountain, fresh peas and beans from my garden and much more.

Today I have the house to myself since this is munchkin's day at his day home and my husband is at work. Plenty of time for thought of missed opportunities or are they really missed? For a split second, I wonder what it would be like to cast off repsonsibility and live a life of sailing the seas. But just for a split second. Though I may yearn for the feel of the rolling seas beneath my feet, I made the choice of love and family. I know they will provide many warm memories and hugs that will sustain my spirit. And I know it is the right choice for more reasons than can be numbered.